Happy Taco Tuesday!

It took me 5 hours to explain to Homeland Security that a Taco is not a threat to air travel.
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961

I've been right all along...

The lab results are in and the all the tests conclusively show that I'm officially bad for myself.
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961

The Power of a Good Memory?

It has been scientifically proven that goldfish have a 3 second memory span. I wonder what their secret is to remembering so much for so long.
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961

Pain Relief Through Chemistry:

My back, neck & shoulders are killing me. But on the plus side, I'm just two pain pills away from Nirvana!
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961

And People Always Wonder Why I'm Always Broke...

My 5 year old grand daughter took my face in her little hands, looked into my eyes & said "I love you Papa...can I have $10.00?" She's good!
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961

How Intelligent Are You?

True intelligence is realizing you're not as smart as you think you are. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a short bus to catch.
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961

Gotta Run...

Sorry I can't stay around and talk but I have to get out of here before the guards know I've escaped.
Gary Nickels
Writer, Speaker and Safely Observing the World Since 1961